D-Day

A week and a half with that dam abscess under that dam tooth, and finally.....tomorrow. Antibiotic's, pain med's....fuck it all. Just take the fucking tooth out. Never thought I would look forward to a tooth extraction, but here I am. The taste in my mouth, the antibiotic's, tomorrow it ends, well kinda. Sure there will be post med's. But I can live with that as long as I know there's a bloody end in sight!

3 roots to be extracted, with out puncturing a sinus cavity, one (Now) half vrot wisdom taken from the root, connected to a nerve vein. And somehow.....bring it on!!! That shit cant be worse than the last two weeks. So here's to tomorrow, come and get me bitch.

Drunk as usual

Drank too much tonight, prob going to drink some more. But it doesnt really matter right? I mean, whos looking, whos taking notes, right? I drink because I find dead sleep there. Its the sleep, that i just fall in to. there are no dreams (that I remember) and it isnt a fight. It just comes, it just takes me away.

Im half between not giving a fuck, and giving all of them. That little man of ours.....hes tippped the balance. Its easy to see now, again hindsight always has 20/20 vision, but Man im tired of just caring. And then there he comes along. Little smile, little hands, little mind. All of that just so curious, so asking. Eveything about him keeping me busy on every level, and I love it.

Its a transition, apparently these happen. But this isnt for me anymore, its all for him. I have to think about him, and that is what feels comfortable, what feels right. Just like, everything for him.

Apparently thats normal.